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Saturday, February 28, 2009

How to Burn a Pot Roast in an Hour

Step 1:
Brown seasoned roast in dutch oven. Add 2 quartered onions, 1 lb. carrots, 3 halved potatoes, skin on. Mmmmm. Smells so yummy!
Step 2:
Preheat oven to 350. Meanwhile, add 1 cup water to roast, bring to boil then reduce to simmer while oven heats.
Step 3:
To burn, go into your sewing room, and pick up a project, while waiting for roast to come to a boil. Be sure to close the door behind you, (Vital to the success of this recipe!) so that the smell of dinner cooking doesn't soak in to your fabrics. Get lost in your project.

Step 4:
Open the door to your sewing room 1 hr. later, and breath in the smoke that has accumulated in the kitchen from the now charred roast that you didn't turn down to simmer while the oven heated. Turn over the carrots, now a glazed black, the roast, and the potatoes, also the same color. Search for the onions that have now disintegrated into the bottom of your burnt dutch oven. If you have a hungry husband, may I suggest ear plugs at this point.
Step 5:
Throw out dinner, and order a pizza.


Tolentreasures said...

Wow, I am not allowing my husband to read that one, or maybe I should, he always says that I would be a good cook if I didn't start a meal and decide to make curtains in the middle of it. (referring to an actual incident he won't let go)
Pizza's good!


AverettLadyNana said...

Sounds like you found my recipe for pot roast !!! LOL...but we just eat it burnt...I could go for pizza but DH doesn't eat it.

Diane said...

Laurie, Did this happen to you? This is funny, especially the part about the earplugs.

Pearl said...

LOL LOL what a crack up! I love how you put the story together. This looks like my kinda cooking. But my pots actually burned to the botton of the grills. My pans were very top notch. The metal actually melts off the side of them and you have molten lava! They were 4 years old so I promtly put them in the garabage (because I've done it twice now) I go out and garden and get lost. I walked in and had white smoke all over the house. Weird I know. I went out and bought a cheap pan set like I've always had and no problems. Except when I get side tracked :)

Sweet Somethings by Lois said...

Been there....burnt that.
Only I was working on a card project in our home office.
Oh well, you just have to think of pizza having all of the four food groups so it's good for you.
Really,,,,,it is.....

Terri's ThreadArt said...

LOL ~ that is SO funny! Oh gosh ~ I have had so many close calls like this! The pizza does look REALLY good though!